The Walking Wounded
by Ladyamesindy
Summary: What if the Cousland warrior's spirit was broken so badly that the ex-Templar and others had to lead our adventuring group? This is a 2 chapter Oneshot.
1. Chapter 1

_This idea came to me after much frustration at being able to help out the characters in the game with their troubles (ex: Alistair and his grief over Duncan) yet no one seemed to care enough (or be programmed to) to ask after my character._

_So, this is my take on what should have occurred in the game with my Cousland. I also couldn't resist using Soldier's Peak again not only because of its proximity to Highever, but because it looks like a GREAT castle/keep to explore! (It's also the background on my laptop computer at the moment!)_

_**Arhiannon**__ is a Welsh name I chose years ago to use if I ever had a daughter. I love it, and as I never had a daughter, I decided to use it here. It is a variation of Rhiannon that I came across many, many years ago. __**Fytheiad**__ is also Welsh for "hound" – how perfect for a mabari, no?_

_As usual, all belongs to Bioware except Arhiannon and Fytheiad._

"_I must do something" always solves more problems than "Something must be done." Author Unknown_

* * *

Arhiannon sat near the fire, her thoughts wandering far away. She knew that if trouble were to arrive, Fytheiad would warn her, so she felt safe … enough. Morrigan had set up her camp nearby, but separate from her and Alistair. Why, she was not sure, but she thought it might have more to do with being used to living in solitude than any anti-social proclivities.

Alistair joined Arhiannon at the fire after setting up his tent. He was silent, a fact which she could understand all too easily. From their previous conversations, Arhiannon knew that Duncan had been important to Alistair – like a father figure, or an older brother. She was sure it would take Alistair time to come to terms with what had happened. She silently snorted in derision at herself. _As if I would know! I still can't …._

It was a long while before Arhiannon stirred herself into some action. Flemeth had provided them with enough food for the evening, mostly dried meats and fruits, and some bread. This she dug out of her pack and carried over to her companion. Taking a seat next to him, she asked, "Are you hungry?"

"Wh-what?" Alistair glanced up to find Arhiannon offering him food. Distractedly, he took what she offered and silently started to eat.

They ate in silence for the most part, though occasionally it was necessary to interrupt it with a few words of request, or thanks. General discussion was out, however, as neither was really in the mood. It was as he handed the bread back to Arhiannon that it occurred to him something was not quite right. Alistair watched her as he chewed his food, trying to determine what exactly it was that was wrong.

Later, it was a testament to the depth of Alistair's own pain and grief as he queried absently, "Have you ever lost anyone close to you?"

Arhiannon felt a sudden sharp, stabbing pain at his words. Quick tears formed and started to roll down her cheeks. Turning away from him, she wiped the moisture away furiously. After a long moment, she turned back … and saw a look of absolute horror cross Alistair's features. She didn't know him well yet, but what she did know of him he had always been a gentleman, so she assumed he was horrified at her reaction to his question. She was looking at his eyes, those amber depths that she could read so easily, and she saw the exact moment that he remembered. She knew he had been made aware, for surely Duncan had told him upon their arrival in Ostagar. Taking a deep breath to steady herself, she reached out and placed a hand on his arm while shaking her head, knowing he was about to speak. "No," she told him, tightening her grip for a moment to emphasize her sincerity. "Please, Alistair, don't say anything just yet."

Arhiannon took another deep breath, relieved that he had respected her wishes and given her the moment she needed. Pulling her hand back, she started to explain, her voice husky with remembered pain and guilt. "My parents, my sister-in-law, my nephew … guests in our home and others …," her breath caught, but she managed to continue. The faces of others, Aldous, Mother Mallol, Ser Gilmore … flitted through her memory. "All were murdered by soldiers of Rendon Howe, a man who was supposed to be my father's long-time and loyal friend." She managed to rise to her feet, not caring as the remnants of their evening meal fell into the dirt.

Arhiannon hardly noticed as Fytheiad jumped to his feet, suddenly, intensely alert, but all of his focus on her. It took the hound only a moment to discern there was no immediate threat before he wandered over to his mistress, rubbing his head against her leg. Alistair thought the animal looked distraught seconds later when Arhiannon simply walked by the animal, paying him no mind, so deep was she in her thoughts.

She moved back and forth around the fire, fidgeting, struggling to find the words she needed. "Duncan," she breathed heavily, not noticing Alistair's reaction to the name. "Duncan was there when it happened, thank the Maker. He-he managed to help my father, who was fatally injured at the time, to a place of safety until my mother and I could reach - him." She didn't even try to stem the flow of tears as she thought of her sire. No longer would she hear the familiar deep voice calling her his "pup."

Taking a deep breath, she continued, "My mother refused to leave his side. She preferred to remain behind at the castle with my father as he lay dying, insisting that Duncan save me, get me out and away, so that I could live…. Live to tell Fergus, my brother; live to be sure that Howe came to justice …." Eyes tightly shut, she struggled. "Duncan agreed to lead me to safety and he brought me to Ostagar, to become a Warden. I wanted – _needed_ – to find Fergus, to warn him in case Howe had sent men after him, but King Cailan said that would be impossible as he was out on patrol at the time in the Korcari Wilds." Staring out at the woods beyond their camp, she added, "I don't even know if he survived …."

Alistair rose to his feet and approached her slowly. He was encouraged when she didn't back away from him, but he could also tell by the way that she was staring at the forest – through it, beyond it – that she probably didn't even know he was at her side at that moment. Carefully, gently, he reached out a hand and took hers. He needed to pull her back to him, to the present. He knew his own depression and grief as the loss of Duncan had led to this, and he wanted, _needed_ to find a way to fix things, if only to ease his own conscience. But it was more than just that, he knew. She was a scrapper in a fight; one of the best duelists he'd come upon and he'd known many in the Wardens. She had led him, the hound and the mage through the Tower of Ishal without a moment's hesitation, but now looked as if she had been broken beyond even her limits.

Arhiannon felt Alistair's hand take hers and the gentle, caring gesture was simply the last straw she could handle. The flood of fear, anger, frustration and loss flooded over and through her, manifesting itself in violent sobs and cries and heart-rending wails of emotional torment that she could no longer hold back. The dam had burst, and she was now caught in its torrent. She only hoped that she could survive the rampage.

Alistair was stunned by her violent reaction and did the only thing he could think to do: he pulled her into his arms and held on to her, praying that it was the right thing to do and would offer her some measure of comfort or at least a lifeline. Out of the corner of his vision, he saw Morrigan creeping forward from his right. Out of curiosity or concern, he wasn't sure. He shook his head at her, watched her nod in comprehension and retreat back to her camp.

Arhiannon lost all sense of time as she stood in the shelter of Alistair's embrace. She could feel the strength of his arms, the warmth of his body as she leaned against him. After a long time, she made sense of the feeling of his hand as it stroked through her now loose ebony waves. When she finally raised her head from his shoulder, her emotions raw but run dry, she glanced up at him. It was then, in that instant, that they both realized just how physically close they were to each other, and the jolt that burned through their bodies as they touched. Arhiannon pulled back first, giving him an excuse to step aside. "I-I'm sorry," she murmured, turning away from him in embarrassment.

"No," he insisted. "The fault was mine. So lost was I in my own … grief… that I completely forgot what Duncan told me had occurred at Highever Castle during his visit," he told her sincerely. He squeezed her shoulder gently. "For that, I apologize."

Taking a deep, steadying breath, she told him in a voice hoarse from crying while drying her now-swollen eyes, "In answer to your question, Alistair, Yes, I have lost many with whom I was close. But," she added sensing that he was about to protest, "that does not diminish the loss of Duncan, or the other Wardens. I may not have known Duncan as long as you, but he was …. Well, he was everything I had hoped he would be from the time that my father introduced us. I know he was more like a father to you," she murmured. "I know you were close to him. For what it is worth, I am very, very sorry for your loss."

Though she wouldn't look at him, Alistair led her back to their seats by the fire. When he tried to assist her to the seat, Arhiannon shook her head. "If you don't mind, I think I will turn in for the night. I-I'm exhausted."

"Do you need any help?" he asked immediately, concerned that she might have worn herself out so much that she wouldn't make it to her tent.

Arhiannon actually smiled and glanced up at Alistair as he realized what he had said and how it had sounded … and then turned beet red all the way to his ear tips. "No thank you," she replied gently, reaching out and touching his arm. "I will be all right. Just wake me in a few hours and I will take over the watch, okay?"

Absently, Alistair nodded while watching her wander off to her tent, a bit relieved that she had let him off the hook so easily for that blunder. He'd started turning back towards the fire when he heard her soft voice call, "Alistair?"

"Yes?" he replied, turning towards her once more.

"Thank you."

Alistair watched the tent flap fall into place and only then did he smile.

* * *

Arhiannon's lone figure stood on the bridge that connected Avernus's tower with the Warden's keep. The only concession she made to the blustery winter conditions was a woolen cloak hastily pulled over her armor, hood pulled close to protect her face and keep her hair from being blown hither and yon.

_So close, but yet so far away_, she thought while staring northwestwards over the bridge wall. _Surely it wouldn't be more than a day's travel from here? Perhaps two at most?_

Sighing, she swiped at the loose tendrils that tickled her cheek and noticed as she did so that she came away with moisture on her hand. _Tears?_ She turned her face into the wind and snow in the hopes of hardening not only her resolve, but her emotions that seemed about to break loose. She didn't have time for this. There was a Blight to stop.

Duncan had once told her, during their escape from Highever and the trip south to Ostagar, that vengeance was not an option. As a Grey Warden, duty came first – duty to stop the Blight and save Ferelden, and the rest of Thedas, from the terror of the darkspawn. Duty to protect those who could not protect themselves. Another sigh. She could almost hear her father now, standing beside her, reminding her gently, "Remember, Pup, you are a Cousland. And Couslands always put their duty first."

Tightening her jaw, she turned yet again, this time south. "You ask too much of me, Father!" she whispered harshly at the memory. "The king is dead, the Wardens are now defunct in Ferelden, or at best hunted into extinction…. Why can I not seize this opportunity to avenge you and mother? Or at least give you what peace I can offer?"

"Vengeance will come in its proper time and place," her father's ghostly image reassured her. "You must focus on the job at hand. Only you and your fellow Warden can defeat the Blight. Without you, the people have no one to protect them. The people must come first. Any concerns about your family must wait."

Swiping once more at the tears that refused to stop, Arhiannon stormed off the bridge in the direction of the keep.

Morrigan was near the large fire that had been built in front of the keep when she saw Arhiannon storm out of the building. The noblewoman had literally thrown the large oak door open so hard that it banged against the stone structure with such a noise that it would not be surprising if the door had suffered some sort of damage. The wilder woman watched the younger woman closely, curiously, as she came to the realization that Arhiannon had bungled into a group of people she had neither sought out nor wanted around her at that particular moment. She turned sharply to her right and headed up the path to seek solitude someplace else.

Leliana watched the events as they unfolded as well, and when she glanced over at Morrigan, concern clear on her delicate features, Morrigan nodded in silent agreement. Something indeed was troubling their fearless leader.

Sten and Alistair were assisting Mikhael Dryden set up his smithing gear. It was Alistair who first saw Morrigan following off after Arhiannon when it was quite clear that the younger woman wanted to be left in peace. "Sten," he called, nodding across the camp in the direction that the women followed. Sten nodded. Both had assisted all they could at this point, the rest was up to Mikhael.

Alistair tried not to worry as he and Sten followed the others. For starters, he didn't really feel as if he had the right. Sure, his relationship with Arhiannon was becoming close – how could it not be when they were thrown together as they were and now had to unite an entire country as well as a mixture of races against a Blight that only they could detect, as well as fight the darkspawn _and_ Teryn Loghain's forces? But, all things to the contrary, he was concerned about her. They had both gone through a number of life-changing events in the previous two weeks. He'd had his chances to vent his frustration, his anger and his grief. She … not so much. She had been too busy organizing and leading their little band of adventurers.

When he and Sten arrived, they found Arhiannon standing at the wall staring out in the distance, down the southwest side of the mountain. The only companion near to her at that point was her loyal mabari, Fytheiad, and even he remained a few feet distant. His occasional whines made it clear to all though that this was not typical behavior for the only surviving Cousland. Leliana and Morrigan both were nearby, but well back, both remaining silent.

Alistair desperately wanted to approach his co-Warden and discern where the trouble lay, but he was very concerned that he would simply make things worse. Usually, he would joke his way out of a situation as serious as this one appeared to be, and while Arhiannon was usually receptive that this approach, Alistair was hesitant to do that in this instance, afraid that he might destroy all that they had built in their relationship so far. He remembered all too clearly her reaction the other evening to his ill-timed question.

It was when he saw her chest heave violently beneath her cloak, that he suddenly knew he could remain silent and distant no longer. He gestured the others away a short distance, and was both surprised and relieved when they, including Fytheiad, did so without comment. Then, taking hesitant steps towards her, he approached. "Arhiannon?" he called softly, reaching out a hand to her shoulder.

Arhiannon's grief and pain was sliced in two as she heard her name on the wind. _Is it my imagination again?_ she wondered. She turned … to find Alistair standing near. "Wh-what?" she managed to choke out.

Alistair placed both hands on her shoulders. _Safe enough, yet touching her, right?_ he teased himself. "Are you all right? You have all of us a bit … concerned at present."

It was then that Arhiannon noticed the others standing nearby. "I-" She stopped. Glancing away in an effort to hide her emotional outburst from him, he halted her movement with his hand. She remained with her eyes downcast so that he couldn't see into them. But she had not counted on his forcefulness, bolstered by his concern for her. Her blue gaze caught his amber one as he tilted her chin up. Seeing the depths of her pain, he asked, "Arhi, what is it? What is wrong?"

Her breathing labored, her emotions raw, the sobs finally broke loose in all their fury, surrounding them both. Not since that first night after Ostagar had he heard her release such anguish … and even then, not quite to this extreme. Alistair caught her slight frame in his arms as she started to collapse to her knees. Kneeling beside her, holding her close, pressing his lips against her hair now that the hood of her cloak had fallen back, he desperately hoped that in some small way he was helping her. Personally, he had his doubts. "Is it being this close to Highever?" he asked with unerring clarity. "Is that what is troubling you like this?"

Shocked that he had read her so accurately, she pulled away from him slightly and managed, "H-how did you know?"

He flashed her one of his cheeky grins. "Despite Morrigan's complaints to the contrary, I'm not stupid," he teased, ignoring said witch's snort from the background. "Well," he added gently and for her ears only, "not completely at any rate!" She smiled sadly in response, but he was encouraged. _It is a smile. That's a start._ "You know," he again spoke softly so that only she could hear, "we could continue on to the Circle Tower via Highever, if that is what you want to do."

In that moment, Arhiannon knew somewhere deep inside her heart that she loved this man. Royal bastard though he might be, he was still a kind, gentle and caring person …. And so different from most men she had met in her lifetime save her father and brother … and Duncan. "We can't," she said flatly, hoarsely, feeling emotionally overwhelmed again. "The last thing my father told me is that as a Cousland, our duty must come first." She leaned forward and kissed his cheek lightly before leaning her head upon his shoulder. "Alistair, you will never know just what it means to me to have you offer this, to know that you would … help me like this. But we both know that we _must_ focus on defeating the Blight. We are the only two remaining Wardens and it is up to _us_ to end it. This has to be our priority. We cannot go off on personal quests and vendettas until we have succeeded with that."

His hands framed her face, the pressure of his fingers light against her skin yet insisting that she look up at him. "We _can_ do this," he told her adamantly once she glanced up, "and we will. You need your own resolution if you are going to be able to focus on the Blight." Out of the corner of his eye, Alistair saw their companions nod in agreement. "It is decided," he told her firmly. "We will leave for Highever first thing in the morning."

As Arhiannon allowed him to assist her to her feet, she heard him add softly, just for her, "This is no different than you agreeing to my request to search for Goldanna when we go to Denerim. And," he added, giving her a knowing look, "I know damned well that you aren't going to keep me from looking for her. Think of this as pre-payment in kind."

Arhiannon smiled her agreement and nodded her thanks.


	2. Chapter 2

_ I made some presumptions in this chapter. In order to make it work, I assume that Morrigan as a shapeshifter can also make others shift their shapes (sort of). I can't really explain it, but it serves its purpose below. Let me know what you think!_

_ All belongs to Bioware except Arhiannon and Fytheiad._

* * *

Leliana trailed a short distance behind Arhiannon and silently as they each measured their steps, watched for obstructions, remained silent and unseen. Both women were relying on their stealth skills in order to approach Highever Castle undetected as it was now under the control of Arl Rendon Howe and his men.

Upon their arrival in the city of Highever, Arhiannon relinquished her leadership role to the others as a group, and Alistair in particular. It was much too dangerous for her to be seen in the place where she had lived as a growing child as all would recognize her as the daughter of Teryn Bryce Cousland and Teyrna Eleanor Cousland. _A fact that is really irrelevant_, she had thought, _since I couldn't trust that I will be able to keep my emotions in check during this time anyway._

Leliana and Alistair located and secured rooms for the five of them (well, six if you counted Fytheiad) at a local tavern. After only moments to "settle in" to said rooms, Morrigan had left for the market district in search of supplies to replenish their stock. Fytheiad remained at the tavern in their rooms to protect their belongings. Alistair and Sten planted themselves in the common room of the tavern itself, separately of course, in order to listen for anything that might be of value while Leliana and Arhiannon left to scout the castle and surrounding areas.

Arhiannon took her time studying the guards at the castle gates from her position in the nearby woods. She had climbed a tree and scooted herself out onto a high branch enough so that she could remain hidden but still see and overhear the men below. She remained this way for quite a while, in the hopes of hearing or observing something of import.

After another ten minutes, she finally backtracked along the branch, silently lowered herself to the ground and found Leliana about a dozen yards to her east. Using a sign language they and been developing during their short time together in order to communicate when sneaking up on adversaries, Arhiannon indicated that Leliana should follow her. So saying, Arhiannon began leading the Orlesian bard around the eastern side of the castle.

The two women were nearing the rear of the fortress, as made evident by the stench coming from the garbage pile. As they crept closer and closer, searching for the secret servant's door which allowed entry into the castle through the larder, a shiny glint caught Arhiannon's eye. Motioning for Leliana to wait, Arhiannon stealthily approached the area.

Leliana grew concerned when she saw Arhiannon drop to the ground suddenly. She could see the younger girl fiddling with something, but her body was hiding the details from Leliana's view. As the time passed, and Arhiannon remained in the same position, one that was only partially hidden, Leliana's concern grew. She was just about to risk exposure of her own position to go and assist her friend when Arhiannon finally rose and made her way back. Leliana could see utter despair in the other woman's eyes, but knew they had a job to do. "Where is the door?"

Arhiannon struggled to focus on the job. She pointed a bit further along the castle wall. Leliana then noticed it and nodded. She knew Arhiannon was upset, and just as she knew that they both could make no further progress this afternoon. "Let's go back to the tavern," she whispered to the younger woman. She waited for Arhiannon's acknowledgement before setting off in the direction of Highever city.

Alistair glanced to his left and watched the two women sneak inside the building while he finished his second pint of ale. Sten was now seated next to him and Alistair nudged the giant's arm just slightly enough to get his attention, barely nodding in the direction of the women. Alistair was the first to rise to his feet and follow after the women after a long ten-count. Sten followed several minutes later.

When Alistair reached the landing he found Leliana exiting the room that the three women would share that evening. She gestured for him to enter his room, then when she spotted Sten ascending the stairs, gestured for him to follow. Once inside, she closed the door behind them and leaned back heavily against it.

"Where is …?" Alistair began almost immediately.

Leliana simply shook her head. "She is resting right now. It's the best thing for her at the moment, trust me." She took a few moments to describe in detail what had occurred while they had been at the castle. She then lifted her right hand, opened her closed fist and showed them a silver ring. "This is what she found."

Alistair took the ring, lifted it and noticed the intricate pattern of leaves and vines that ran its circumference. The ring was beautiful, and valuable. Alistair also thought he could see an inscription on the inside of the band, but it was worn almost smooth … "…Eleanor …" he read. It suddenly hit him. "Eleanor Cousland?" he queried, looking at Leliana, a look of profound sadness crossing his features.

Sighing sadly, Leliana nodded. "Arhiannon wouldn't say much, but I suspect that what she found near the garbage dump were the bodies of her parents … and the ring was still on her mother's hand at the time …."

The silence in the room was indefinite. After a time, each to their own thoughts, Leliana carefully took the ring back from Alistair. "I promised her that I would clean it for her," she murmured before leaving the room.

Alistair was stunned. It had been what … two weeks? More? … since the fall of Highever Castle. What had Arhiannon seen when she found her parents' bodies? Anger began building inside him, at first it was only a spark, but soon it had caught hold and burned brighter and brighter. After a time, he muttered darkly, "That bastard is going to pay!"

Sten surveyed his comrade deciding silently that he was beginning to approve what he had observed in him as of late. Nodding once, he said, "Tonight. Tonight we give her piece of mind. Tomorrow, we hunt the Vashedan!"

Alistair suddenly realized what Sten had in mind and nodded, a dark almost violent look overtaking his normally sedate gaze. "Yes. Tonight." He then turned to leave the room. Over his shoulder, he added to Sten, "I'll be back in a little while to make plans. See if you can't track down Morrigan. I have a feeling we may need her this evening …."

Quietly, Alistair began crossing the landing to the door to the room where Arhiannon was resting. Before he made it, Leliana returned, acting as if she would enter. Alistair stopped her. "May I?" he asked, reaching out for the ring.

Leliana was startled, but nodded in agreement. "Of course." She handed over the piece of jewelry and turned to head downstairs to the common room. "I need a drink!" she whispered conspiratorially.

Alistair smiled warmly at her and gave her a quick hug of thanks. "One well deserved," he agreed. "And, Leliana?" He watched as she turned back to face him. "Thank you… for watching out for her."

Leliana smiled back at him just as warmly. She was beginning to grow fond of the ex-Templar. She reached out and squeezed his hand. "Go to her, Alistair," she told him softly. "She needs someone she can trust right now. She needs her fellow Warden."

Wondering silently to himself at her comment, Alistair, as quietly as he could, slipped inside the room. He smiled when he saw Fytheiad's attention perk up at the intrusion. Thankfully, the dog didn't growl at him like he usually did. As he neared the bed and the dog, he reached out and scratched the animal behind the ears. Fytheiad noticeably relaxed, but gave Alistair a worried look as well as a soft whine of concern.

"I know boy," he murmured. "I'm worried too."

Arhiannon was lying on the bed, curled up into a ball like a child. Every once in a while, Alistair could hear her hiccup, but her breathing was deep and he knew that she slept, at least for the moment. _She must have cried herself to sleep_, he realized. Cautiously, he made his way over to the bed. He debated with himself if he should sit down next to her, offering her simple comfort by his presence, or holding her, or … something. It was in those moments, as he struggled with his decision that he heard her whimper softly. Concerned, he glanced down at her to see her eyes shoot open and her body bolt upright. "Arhi?" he called softly, not wanting to startle her.

Arhiannon heard Alistair's voice, but was only seeing the past. "No!" she pleaded in a soft whimper. "Father!"

Alistair seated himself on the side of the bed within touching distance, but not reaching out just yet. Knowing how she could be when startled from sleep, for he'd seen it too many times in camp since Ostagar, he wanted to be sure that she knew that it was he in the room before he got close enough to be … damaged. "Arhiannon?" he called again, his voice only slightly louder than before.

Slowly, Arhiannon blinked, trying to bring her surroundings into focus. As she did so, she noted that both Alistair and Fytheiad were nearby. Gasping for breath, she stammered, "I-I thought –" She shuddered with the memories of the past, with the nightmares of the present and the insecurities of the future. Spinning suddenly, she threw herself at Alistair, sobbing.

Alistair was startled by her actions, but managed to get his arms around her before she fell or knocked them both off the bed. Holding her close, he began to wonder if maybe she had been right about not dealing with this … issue at the present time. _Will she be able to withstand it all?_ he thought to himself. Rocking her slightly as they sat in the bed, Alistair sincerely hoped that he was offering her assistance or peace of mind at least.

It could have been minutes or hours later, Alistair wasn't sure which, when Arhiannon finally pulled back from his body. He noticed as she did so that the moment her body left his, the space where she had been felt chilled. He had pulled himself firmly onto the bed earlier, and now adjusted so that she was still within the security of his arms, but had the space she seemed to require at the moment. "Arhi?" he murmured.

Arhiannon moved forward slightly, turned away from him. She was embarrassed at her behavior, and didn't want him looking at her. _Why, oh why, _she thought frantically, _do I always come unglued around him?_ She had unbound her hair earlier, and she now allowed the dark locks to fall as a curtain, hiding her face from him. "Y-yes?" she responded softly.

Alistair who had been running a hand up and down her back absently while holding her was unaware that he was still doing so. The motion seemed to soothe her raw feelings, however, so she did not protest. When he didn't speak, she turned slightly.

Alistair said a silent prayer before reaching out for her hand. When she gave it to him, he turned it palm up and placed the silver ring in the center of her palm. He folded her fingers over it so that it wouldn't fall out. He watched as she struggled, afraid that she would burst into tears once again, and was surprised when she did not. She opened her palm and touched the ring, tracing the pattern around the band. "My father had this made for my mother," she whispered painfully, "when he asked her to marry him." She swallowed hard past a lump in her throat and when she spoke again her voice was rough. "My mother said it was a frivolous thing, unnecessary… but in all of my years, I never saw her without it on her finger." A single tear dropped, landing in the center of the ring. Inhaling sharply, Arhiannon took the ring and slid it on the middle finger of her right hand. "Th-thank you," she stammered. "And, please, thank Leliana as well."

Alistair smiled gently. "I will," he promised. He shifted his position so that he no longer was leaning back against the wall. "Will you come down with me for dinner?" he asked as he stood. "You really should eat something."

Arhiannon shook her head. "N-no," she struggled. "Not tonight. I just want to sleep."

Alistair leaned forward, resting his forehead against hers, touching her tear-stained cheek with calloused fingers. "You have to take care of yourself," he reminded her gently. "I can't lose you like I lost Duncan and the others. I can't do this all alone. We are a team, remember?"

If she hadn't heard the slight panic in his voice, she might have laughed. But she had heard it, knew he was still grieving over his own losses, and knew as well that he was completely serious in what he told her just now. "I will be fine," she promised, reaching up to squeeze his hand reassuringly. Pulling back and looking deep into his dark eyes, she added seriously, "I promise."

* * *

It was early the next morning, before the sun rose, that Leliana and Morrigan both roused her from a dreamless sleep. "Wha-?" Arhiannon mumbled in confusion. She had never been much of a morning person, but before sunrise was a definite mistake, particularly when she felt as if she needed to sleep for a week or more.

"You need to dress," Leliana whispered near her ear. "We are leaving … now."

Arhiannon rubbed her eyes, trying to dislodge the sleep from them. "What's going on?" she asked as she finally rose and started to pull on her armor.

Both women simply remained quiet, shaking their heads. Within a few minutes, they were out in the hallway with all of their gear, meeting up with Alistair, Sten and Fytheiad. Alistair directed them down a back stairway and out into the alley behind the tavern. He turned east, leading them down the pathway until they reached a slightly wider cross street. At that point, Leliana moved forward and took the point, Alistair remaining at his position and bringing up the rear. As Arhiannon passed by him, he reached out and pulled up her hood to cover her head. Dark as though her tresses might be, and still before dawn, they couldn't afford for her to be noticed. "Invisible," he whispered near her ear.

Smiling slightly at him, she nodded.

They traveled quietly, near silently until they were well outside the city walls. Arhiannon wondered where they were heading, but refused to ask anything knowing that any sound could endanger their lives. They seemed to be heading away from the town, away from the castle, and that confused her. _But, I'm not through here yet …_ she thought, panic-stricken.

Alistair sensed Arhiannon's rising anxiety and moved in step beside her. Placing an arm around her shoulders, he queried softly, "Trust me?" At her nod, he smiled reassuringly and gestured for her to keep in front of him.

About an hour after leaving the tavern, the group veered off in a slightly southern direction towards a hilly area. Within a few more moments, she noticed why. Someone had built several pyres, and upon each were the remains of …. She stepped closer to the platforms. The individuals resting there were those she had loved and lost in the Battle of Highever Castle! Staggering forward, she didn't realize that she was alone, save Fytheiad who had also known these people. To the left were Oriana and Oren, to the right Ser Gilmore and Nan, and in the center … "Father? Mother?" she breathed. She approached the bier and knelt down next to it, leaning her head against the tree limbs that had been cut for this purpose. She didn't see the remains as she had viewed them the previous day at the castle dump. These… The bodies looked as if they were whole, intact, that each was simply sleeping and could wake at any given moment. Arhiannon frowned, standing once more and looking around….

Then she felt it, the slight aura around each pyre. _Magic!_ She realized that it must have been Morrigan's doing. Turning back towards her companions, she offered a hesitant smile of thanks. Leliana was the first to take a step forward, reaching out for Arhiannon's hands as she neared. Reassuringly, the bard squeezed them. Alistair and Sten soon followed with Morrigan bringing up the rear. Arhiannon was too overwhelmed by emotion to say anything aloud, but she hugged each one of her companions in turn, even Morrigan who would have refused had she not cared, even a little.

Alistair and Sten both had brought torches with which to light the pyres, and now took a moment to light them. Leliana softly asked, "Would you like me to recite the Chant of Light for them?"

Arhiannon nodded, managing a hoarse "Please," before dropping next to the hound. Placing her arms around the animal's neck, she hugged him close as she said goodbye to her friends and family. At the same time, she heard Fytheiad's little barks and yips and knew that he, too, was grieving.

As she sat there watching the fires burn, allowing her grief to run its course through the tears coursing down her cheeks, she thought about what her companions had done for her this day. Upon their return to the tavern, Arhiannon had barely spoken to Leliana, but knew that the bard would be smart enough to draw at least some conclusions having seen what Arhiannon had seen at the castle. When Alistair had approached her later that day, she had only sought comfort for her aching heart, not conversation which he had, thankfully, not tried to force upon her. _They must have gone out while I slept_, she realized.

It was late afternoon when the fires had finally cooled enough that Arhiannon could gather some of the ashes to take with her, to scatter to the winds when she found the right place, others to save so that she would never forget. As she knelt by each individual pyre, she said her final goodbyes. First to her nephew and sister-in-law. Next to Ser Gilmore and Nan. Finally to her parents. Then, her emotions all spent, she rose to her feet, adjusted her armor and turned to face the others. Taking a deep breath and signaling Fytheiad ahead of her, she announced, her voice almost normal once more, "Let's go. We've got a Blight to stop."

* * *

That evening, after they had established camp well away from Highever and were preparing their evening meal, Arhiannon returned from a nearby pond where she had taken the opportunity to wash up. She set her belongings inside her tent, now dressed only in dark leggings and a blue tunic with gold edging that matched her eyes, and took a seat at the fire between Sten and Leliana which had been reserved for her, and nodded her thanks when Leliana passed her a filled plate. She laughed when she saw how much food the utensil was laden with. Obviously, her companions not only knew how much a Warden needed to eat, but realized she had skipped a day or two worth of meals.

Alistair watched Arhiannon from the opposite side of the fire, his worry finally easing for the first time in … well, in a long while. Probably since that first night on the road with Morrigan when Arhiannon had told him what had happened to her before Ostagar. There was still the Blight to defeat, allies to gather and numerous other tasks to be taken care of, but Arhiannon seemed to be in much better spirits than she had when they'd been at Soldier's Peak. "So," he asked, a teasing tone to his voice, "I assume our fearless leader is ready to take over the reins of leadership once again?" He watched as she laughed, really laughed a genuine, if somewhat subdued, laugh for the first time since he'd met her. "May I take it that's a yes?" She nodded and smiled at him. Alistair pretended to wipe his brow in relief. "Whew!" he jested. "And not a moment too soon!"

The others smiled or chuckled, all relieved that things were now seemingly back on track in their journey.

Before departing their separate ways after their meal, Arhiannon motioned for them all to stay for a moment. "I want to thank you all," she said softly, "for what you did back at Highever. Given the enormity of the task, and the short time in which we were there, you were all able to help me find the … peace that I … and they needed." She looked at each individual, a solid strong look of thanks that she hoped would express her feelings more clearly. "Alistair was right – I needed personal resolution before I could focus on the job at hand." She smiled. "Thank you."

Later that evening, Arhiannon remained at the fire, simply staring into the flames in deep thought while absently scratching Fytheiad behind his ears. She heard someone walking up behind her, and managed to pull her thoughts back to the present just as Alistair took a seat next to her. She smiled over at him. "I … want to thank you again," she murmured, reaching out to touch his hand and squeeze it.

Alistair blushed slightly. Clearing his throat, he assured her, "No thanks is necessary."

Arhiannon turned towards him. When he looked at her, their gazes caught, she told him softly, "Yes, Alistair, it is. Despite your comments to the contrary, you took charge of the situation, led the group and managed to get the job done … quickly, effectively, and with a positive result." She laughed. Sighing, she rose to her feet, brushed off her pants and crossed to his side. Leaning over, she kissed his cheek. "Thank you."

When she pulled back and began to turn, he quickly rose to his feet and caught her shoulder. Turning her back, he suddenly paused, not quite sure what his original intentions had been, but knowing he wanted to do something … say something. Raising a hand to her cheek, threading his fingers into hair now unbound and hanging loose over her shoulders, he told her sincerely, "I didn't want to let you down."

Arhiannon leaned into his touch, reveling in the feel of his calloused fingers against her skin. "You didn't," she assured him. She stepped back and turned towards her tent. "Good night, Alistair."

Alistair watched her cross the camp to her tent. "Good night," he murmured after her.


End file.
